Quit Feeling Weird About Asking Readers To Pay You

Addressing the great internet debate about writers asking for coffee/tip money.

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I might want to buy you a coffee, but I can’t if you never build a cafe in your front yard.

There seems to be a great internet debate about writers asking for coffee/tip money. I feel like the argument scale is fairly balanced between both sides.

Is it cheesy and desperate to ask for money, or isn’t it?

I once read a fellow writer’s viewpoint on why she would never ask her readers to buy her a coffee. She was convinced that throwing around coffee money would turn into a tit-for-tat game where writers start keeping a tally of who owes whom a tip.

Here’s the thing though….

She thinks of it as tipping. I call it paying it forward.

Nobody who uses tipping apps is making demands. They’re giving readers the option to show appreciation for the art they consume. They’re putting a suggestion out into the universe, not keeping a spreadsheet of who does or doesn’t fork over some cash.

Giving or receiving a virtual coffee is an opportunity, not an expectation.

Especially on Substack, where we don’t have a built-in tipping option. A reader might not want to give you $5.00 every month, but they might want to give you $5.00 today. And if they do, it’s not the tip that’ll change your life; it’s the feeling that accompanies it.

From my perspective, it’s a karma thing.

Long before I tested these tipping apps for myself (on Medium), I occasionally tipped other writers anywhere between $5 and $50, depending on the situation.

I like to tip writers because they're delightful people who deserve an unexpected smile, not because they've written something profound.

Several years ago, a fellow Medium writer randomly sent me $1000.00 😳 and I didn’t even have a tip jar set up yet. I woke up to a PayPal notification advising me of the money transfer.

I was so certain it was a scam that I called PayPal to confirm whether the sender was a verified user. Indeed, he was.

I reached out to thank him and decline the money because I didn’t feel comfortable accepting it. He responded by saying that if I declined the money, I’d deny him the pleasure of giving it.

He basically refused my refusal and taught me a valuable lesson about the power and pleasure of giving.

After experiencing his incredible generosity, I had no choice but to look for a way to pay it forward by tipping another writer $50.00. Not because I wanted something in return, but because I could.

Why can’t we just consider buying random coffees for random writers as an acknowledgement for all the UNpaid work we do?

So, instead of assuming that everyone who wants to get paid is a prime suspect, try leaving yourself open to possibilities. You never know what might fly in through an open window.

I have enough caffeine in my system, so if you choose to click the image below, I’ll give a treat to my 95-pound lap dog. She’s a bottomless pit.

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